True Blue

So if you should ever doubt, wonder what life is all about, then please remember dear, those words I've whispered in your ear.. and they weren't I'm a material girl. So maybe I send mixed messages, Sure I like the night life I love to boogie, but I am a simple girl raised by parents that taught me mid-western values. I've found that in my life; it is more elegant and charming to show how thrifty one can be . 2008 is the backlash of the 80-90's. I've spent too much $$ on nothing. Big houses and cars have not brought me the happiness and the security I thought they would. Nothing replaces a good spouse and a few good friends. This is what life is about. So when your spouse still thinks that you are only based on $$$ after everything life has dealt you, you really wonder. Have you hid who you are so well you forgot to show the one who should know what you are all about who you really are? When you though you whispered, Should you have shouted?? How do you be an open book when so many pages have been ripped out? When you are most vulnerable how can you be brave enough to rip off the scabs and make a new start? me I guess. it is always ME. the one with the brave face who will mix it up. but I can't get the real message of who I am across.

she's come undun

I guess have evolved yet I forgot to send the forwarding address.
We are always measured by our past behavior. ( Thank you Dr.Phil) I am blessed with the ability of forgetting. today is all I know and all I am is who I am today. This is why I avoid my past. If I don't feel it or smell it, it doesn't exist . All I truly know is today and what I feel today. I was reminded that I once wrote a bible . oh the crazy egocentricity of a teenager ( I really don't remember what even was in it all I remember was a cartoon with a penis and a cape ) my friend at the time saw a midget and an Indian who would come put of her closet... I have heard an seen so much that I feel like I am the sane one .. Sanity is a state of mind. Those who feel they are truly sane are truly repressing. I know I have a different take on reality but your perception is your reality. Why can't it work in my favor for once? I see what other people don't see. Which really means I don't see the obvious. Just my own skewed view of the world.
Yet this is all I know, this is my reality. I hope those who love me see the beauty of who I am.
the lack of rage in my life. ODD?? The new point I make to bring peace to lives. The lack of chaos without boredom.. peace out may the force b with u